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Breaking up

How to break up with your girlfriend or boyfriend

If you’ve decided to break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re probably wondering how to tell him/her. Here are some Do’s and Don’ts to make sure things go as well as possible.

Do

  • If your relationship is healthy, it’s best to announce your decision in person rather than on the phone or by text. It will be easier for the other person if you’re there to witness his/her reactions and explain your reasons.
  • Take your time and be open to discussion.
  • Explain your decision clearly and precisely.
  • Be direct without being hurtful. Talk about yourself and your feelings and use “I.”
  • Stay firm about your decision, even if the other person is angry, disappointed, or sad. His/her reactions are his/her business.

Don't

  • Accusing or blaming the other person does no good and risks making the conflict worse.
  • Belittling the whole relationship is unfair and hurts the other person. Even if things aren’t working between you anymore, remember that you’ve had some good times together.
  • Remember that vengeance is useless. You may be feeling lots of grief or anger, but you don’t have the right to wreck the other person’s life. Focus on yourself and your own happiness, and move on.
  • A present is a present. Don’t give back the other person’s gifts to you or ask for the presents you gave him/her back.

 

These tips should help you go through the breakup more easily. Nevertheless, a breakup can trigger strong or unpredictable reactions in the other person. If you feel nervous, talk to an adult you trust or call us!

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