The symptoms alerted you to the possibility. The pregnancy test confirmed your suspicions. You have an embryo in your belly. Now what do you do?
If the result of the pregnancy test is positive, first contact the nurse at your school or CLSC or a doctor. They can verify where you are in your pregnancy, that is, the number of weeks since your egg was fertilized.
This information will guide you through the next steps. These professionals can also give you valuable support. Don’t be afraid to share this process with a person you trust, such as a girlfriend or a parent.
Discuss and think
You need to make a choice: keep the baby, put it up for adoption, or have an abortion. These are three huge decisions, and there’s no going back from any of them. Take the time to ask yourself what you really want. Don’t make your choice to please someone else or because you’re scared of other people’s opinions.
Don’t hesitate to spend time with neutral people who can support you in this thought process: a nurse or social worker from your school or CLSC, or Tel-jeunes. You can also talk about what you’re going through with someone you trust: your partner, your friends, your parents, etc. Nobody will – or can – decide for you, but this support is important.
Consider your partner
It takes 2 to make a baby. What’s your relationship with the partner who’s responsible? Does he know you’re pregnant? Do you want to talk to him about it?
Getting your partner involved in the decision gives you a chance to see if you can count on his support in the next steps. It may also turn out that you don’t have the same opinion about what choice to make. What will you do if you disagree? Since it’s your body, the final decision is yours.
Get your family involved (or not)
If you’re aged 13 or under, your parents have to be informed, no matter what you decide. That’s the law. If you’re 14 or over, though, you don’t have to tell them.
But would you still like to talk to them about it or discuss your choices with them so they can help you decide? Give them time to absorb the news before you start worrying about their reaction. It’s possible that your dad or mom will change their mind once they’ve had time to take it in. You also have to think about what you’ll do if your parents don’t support you in your decision. Some parents disagree so strongly with their daughter’s choice that they decide to break off relations with her. If you’re afraid that might happen, be sure to get help from a counsellor at your CLSC or another family member. Don’t forget that you’re never alone.
Make your choice
You’ve thought about it. You’ve involved some people who supported you in thinking things out. You’ve considered all the options. You’re ready: you’ve made your choice. You want to keep the baby, put it up for adoption, or have an abortion.
If we said the worst was behind you, we’d be lying. But you’ll still find it easier to go through what happens next knowing that you made the right decision, for the right reasons.