Friendship

If it’s not working anymore with a friend, you might think about ending the friendship. Before making your decision, think carefully. If you act on the spur of the moment, you might regret it later. To make things easier, you might gradually build some distance, text less often, spend less time with him/her, etc.

If you definitely want to end your friendship, clearly identify the reasons. Choose a quiet time and respectfully tell your friend about your decision. Speak about what you feel and talk using “I.” Avoid accusing him/her and support your claims with observable facts.

Be discreet. Don’t talk about it to everyone, announce it on social media, send your friend a message through someone else, or ask your mutual friends to choose sides. The separation will probably be hard on your friend, and there’s no point in making it worse!

If you’re having problems with your group of friends, you can talk to them to try to improve things. But if that doesn’t work and you don’t feel comfortable with them anymore, you might also choose to find new friends.

To create new friendships, you can engage in activities where you’ll meet new people. You might also smile at people you find interesting when you meet them, start saying hello to them, talk to them about anything and everything. If they seem to be reacting positively, you can suggest that you could eat together at school or invite them to take part in an activity. Gradually, you’ll form new friendships and change groups.

If you decide to leave your old group of friends, do it respectfully and don’t talk about them behind their backs. Just tell them that you like them but you want to meet new people.

If you think your relationship with your friend is deteriorating because he/she is spending too much time with his/her lover, it might be time to talk about it. Calmly explain what you’re feeling and why you’re worried. Are you afraid of losing your friend? Do you feel that his/her relationship isn’t healthy? Do you need to be reassured? Tell your friend what you need and try to understand his/her view of the situation.

After you’ve talked about it, if the situation doesn’t get better, remember that you can’t change other people. Don’t stay alone in your room; give yourself the right to be happy and make new friends. Friendships change during our lifetime and that gives us a chance to meet new people.

First take time to think. Is your friend really becoming more distant or is that just your impression? Why is he/she pulling away from you? Talk to your friend and express your fears and feelings, without blaming him/her for the situation; speak using “I.” Together, see if you want to improve the situation and how you might do it.

If that doesn’t work, maybe you could take a break so both of you can think about things and take the time to define what you really want. You can also meet new friends and get interested in other people. If you need support, talk to a trusted adult or Tel-jeunes.

First, identify what you’re feeling: jealousy, anger, sadness, betrayal? Do you believe a friend should never be interested in one of your exes? Or do you think he/she is entitled to take a chance? If your heart was broken, it might be hard for you to see your friend with your ex. Are you comfortable seeing them together? Do you want to hear about their love story? Talk about it with your friend or your ex so everyone can feel comfortable in the situation, and set clear limits if you’re afraid of being hurt. Before you drop your friend, think carefully. Sometimes talking about it will sort out lots of things.