Pornography

It’s normal to be curious, but porn doesn’t have many positive aspects. In any case, it’s meant for adults aged 18 and over. Your erotic imagination is still under construction and watching porn is likely to give you bad reference points. You might end up finding it difficult to know what healthy real-life sex is like, since porn isn’t reality. And there’s a difference between pornography and erotica. Erotica tells a story, in images or words, of a person drawn to another person by desire. Porn doesn’t tell a story: it shows actors who engage in crude actions in order to trigger sexual arousal.

No. Porn can’t teach you anything because it’s not faithful to reality. In real life, you’ll discover your tastes and preferences, and your partner’s, over time, with practice and experience. If you’re curious and you want to learn more, there are other sources of information: books, documentaries or TV shows, web videos made by professionals, your doctor, your parents or other people you know and feel comfortable talking to. You can also turn to erotic movies and books. Unlike porn, which presents explicit sexual images, erotica can help you develop your erotic imagination and reassure you about how you might approach a partner.

Yes. Porn is designed to create fast, easy arousal in the people who watch it. In real life, people have to make some effort to reach that level of arousal with a partner: stroking, kissing, sweet talk, tenderness, etc. The law prohibits porn for young people under age 18. If you watch it, it should only be occasionally and you should also have other sources of arousal. Use your imagination! If you watch too much porn, you might find it hard to get aroused in other situations, since you’ll become dependent on images. As well, it can warp reality and make you find real sex disappointing. If you’re inspired by these images, your expectations won’t be realistic. You might want to keep on watching and then find it difficult to get aroused alone or with your partner.

Men seem to be more aroused than women by the strong, crude images shown in porn. Women often prefer to watch how the chemistry and desire between partners grow. They’re interested in the words and caresses they exchange. Porn is almost always created for a male audience: in most scenes, you see mainly the woman and her reactions. Porn is made to arouse men more.

Porn shows unrealistic scenes. In real life, you’ll learn with practice and experience. You can also learn to know yourself by trying things with your body before you have sex with a partner. Sexuality is a space for discovery. Enjoy exploring your sexuality and listening to your partner. Sometimes you might like something and so will your partner… other times, that doesn’t happen. Talk about it together!